Last night, I went 6-0 in beer pong. If you're in college, you can appreciate how legit that is. If you're not in college, you probably think I'm a douche.
So, after copious amounts of obnoxious celebration, this recent win streak got me thinking. I have ONE YEAR left in this magical wonderland called college, and I feel that I have acquired (mastered *ahem*) a number of useless skills.
Unless the fate of the world and humankind depends on me ending a nuclear war by throwing an object similar to a ping-pong ball into a kill switch that is 8 feet away and strategically shaped like a red cup (yes, it has to be red), I'm afraid my beer pong skills are completely useless.
But although bouncing a quarter into a glass or somehow fitting 2 liters of beer in my stomach won't impress future employers, perhaps I've learned more than a couple bar tricks. I gave it some thought and realized that a lot of these seemingly useless college escapades can and will help me when I venture out into the real world.
Don't agree with me? This is how I see it. Some of it makes sense. Some is just to make me feel better about the fact that I take time to practice drinking games (yes, this actually happens). Either way, I had a damn good time doing it. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Flip Cup: strengthens your ability to work with a team. In this game you are a teammate, coach, and cheerleader. Few other activities really emphasize the importance of patience, teamwork, and the power of motivation. You never want to be the weak link, so you give 110% to the team.
King's Cup: teaches one how to adapt to his or her environment. Keeping track of the Thumb Master or following all of the RIDICULOUS rules people make up (like no pointing or freaking cure cancer before opening your beer or something) forces you to be aware of your environment and to pick up on every nuance while in, uh, particularly difficult circumstances.
Also, when someone pulls a "categories" card, there are only so many breakfast cereals or 18th century Gothic architects the average person can name off the top of their head. You'll need to be able to think quickly on your feet and recall all that information hidden in every nook and cranny in your brain. And you thought it was just a card game. Psh.
Beer Pong: humility. There is a very fine line between cockiness and confidence. You can sink 9 cups in a row, but back to back grenades, a bounce and an island could mean a dramatic end to your near perfect game. Think too much, you choke. Too careless, blow the game. Maintaining your composure when you're up or down in the cup count (or in life) is absolutely imperative.
Outside of drinking games...
Buying alcohol: prioritizing. What's more important? Getting fed or getting faded? Do you buy the 30 rack and skip dinner, or do you invest in a nutritious meal but sacrifice the absolutely hilarious and inevitable debauchery that goes hand in hand with inebriation?
Procrastination: yup. It's a good thing. While in school, procrastination is, well, masochistic. But all those nights of cramming, greeting the sun with a can of Red Bull in hand was not for nothing. In the workplace, deadlines happen. They happen so fast that even taking a bathroom break is seen as procrastinating. Good thing you're used to shitting out 47 pages on the Russian Revolution in less than an hour. Anything after that is a cakewalk.
TELEbears: Learning to accept the things you can't control. Now, TELEbears is the UC Berkeley class registration system, but this concept applies to anyone who has ever had to sign up for classes online. Signing up for classes is always an infuriating, dramatic, and often devastating chore, and being obligated to do it twice a year is two times too many.
Any system that takes seven clicks to sign up for a class but only one to pay tuition is bound to not have it's users' best interest at heart. It breaks down and when it does work, you're only allowed to access it from 4:05 - 4:06 AM on the third Wednesday of every other February, on leap year...or something of that nature.
It's a system that you need but it doesn't need you, and that’s something we have to live with. There will be many times that we'll be dependent on something that makes NO sense, but sitting there and complaining about it won't get the job done. Bitching about how TELEbears froze just in time to put you 8374578743983947th on the wait list isn't going to get you the class. Grin and bear it. Sometimes our pride takes a shot for the greater good. It teaches you to roll with the punches and to be ready for anything.
They always say that the most important lessons are learned outside of the classroom. I feel I've done my fair share of field research. Who knew I'd be drinking and procrastinating my way to success?
Just know that there’s a lesson to be learned in everything. What you learn in the books probably won't stick, but the street smarts you've (hopefully) acquired will be added to your Batman Utility Belt for life.
But for the time being...6-0 BABY!!! SAY SOMETHIN'.
College <3
