Always time to talk about love :)

Love. We're gonna talk about love.

A little while back, someone very important to me decided to leave a short but unforgettable comment on my Facebook.

My friend, Brian, is one of those guys you can't help but squeeze to death every time you see him. He's an incredible musician, quite the engineer, and an exceptional beer pong player (unless he's playing me). Best of all, Brian is just one of those people who I could talk to forever.

My favorite part about these conversations is that Brian often gets confusing. Whether he's leading me through something he learned in physics or explaining some random fact that he happened to find on the internet, I sometimes get lost, but Brian will never give up on me or the conversation. He will explain it til I understand it.

I love Brian because he makes me think.

He actually makes me to think whether I want to or not. I can't tell you how many conversations I've navigated in a drunken haze, but I absolutely love it because I always learn something new. I learn something new about the world or about the way I think about the world.

This Facebook post was no exception. He wrote:

Sometimes, I wish the 'like' function on Facebook could be applied to people. Because sometimes I don't just 'like' Angie Picardo's link, or her video, or her picture, or her post. I 'like' the whole package, and it pains me that this cannot properly be expressed with a single click on everyone's favorite social networking hellhole.

However, when I really start delving into this dilemma, I realize that the 'like' button could never even begin to compliment you on the same order of magnitude that I intend my compliment to reach. Thus, it would be demeaning to this entire relationship for me to use it (supposing this were even an option). It would be an insult. Even still, I want the option.

Anyway, this has been fun. Your usual style and grace (more specifically, my need to express my appreciation for it) has provided a sufficiently long distraction from my study of mass inflation instability, which I will now return to.

Love,
Anonymous

Now, most people would give an "Aw, gee thanks" or a "you're so sweet."

That's not how we do shit roun' hurr. Brian doesn't just compliment or gush. He could very well leave a simple "yer prettyyyy" on my wall. As accurate as that statement would be, it wouldn't be his style.

Nope. Brian made me think. I thought about and engaged with his comment because that's what it deserves. That's what he deserves. My response:

Dear Anonymous,

Unfortunately, I will have to disagree. Facebook may only allow for a single aspect to be “liked” at a time, but that is the very nature of love that many overlook. 

If we were given a button with which we could “like” an entire individual, we may only do it once. After that, the only option is to “dislike.” To me, that is a very black and white option in a very gray world. To like (or love) a person all at once, in their entirety, is impossible only because we are constantly changing. We could find something we don’t like or could find something new that makes us like them even more. Then what? We find a SUPER “like” button?

No. Facebook got it just right because love is based on the collage of stolen moments, those seconds in time when you feel connected to that person, when the only reason you’d ever let go is because of the hope that you’ll get to come back and feel your heart catch fire all over again. When you like their status, their link, their picture, you like them in that present moment. 

And all we have is the present. 

When I click to like Brian Grubbs’s profile picture or his status about Reggie eating his joint; when I see the smile of content defeat when I make the last cup in one-on-one; when he hugs me so tight that after we let go I can feel all the blood rush through my heart—that is when I am able to love him. 

I am able to love him, fully love him, when I can do it over and over again.

So, Anonymous, don’t chastise Facebook for not allowing us to “like” an entire being with a single click. That’s too easy. Love is difficult, it’s dynamic, it’s painful, it’s beautiful. It’s love that makes us want to delve deeper into a person in order to find yet another reason to love them. It’s the opportunity to individually “like” aspects of a person’s profile that make us scour our newsfeed and explore their page just for the chance to click and “like” love yet another part of them. Love is what keeps us coming back for more.

Sincerely yours,

Angeli M. Picardo

When I say I love someone, it's not just because they're nice, or smart, or because--as Colbie Callait put it-- they "make me tingle in a silly place."


I believe that someone you love, truly love, is a person who makes you feel; a person who moves you, challenges you, makes you more than you were ten seconds ago. I reserve my love for people who remind me that I have a mind, body and soul that are absolutely extraordinary.

No, Bri Guy and I are not romantically in love, but we share a connection that I think even married couples are missing. I love Brian because he makes me feel. Whether it's with big, hold-you-til-you-choke hugs or by making me think so hard my brain melts, Brian reminds me that I am here, I am alive, and I've got a lot of exploring to do.

If I've ever told you that I love you, it's because you have made me notice, understand, and love something about myself. If I've ever told you that I love you, you have somehow moved me in a way that no one else has and probably ever will. Thank you :)

Hang on to the people who make you feel, who make you want more. They're the ones who'll somehow keep you grounded but help you fly to higher heights than you've ever imagined.

So, here's to love, ya'll. Cheers.